Are you waiting for a ‘green light moment’? For someone in your life to give you the go-ahead to buy something truly exciting? To wear Moot? Do you look at other people who are free to wear this gorgeous stuff and think that you are somehow different? That your life can never be like theirs? Do you see and hear Jules and think that it’s OK for him, he has a special pass to access this underwear and you'll never get your own pass?
Do you revisit the pages knowing what styles, what pieces, you would choose, but also knowing that you’re not going to do it because someone else might not like it? You might get in trouble?
Do you wish that your partner was into this? That they would buy some brilliant underwear for you and take the decision out of your hands? That they would give you the green light?
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If the answer to any of these is yes, we hate to disappoint you, but we think that you are going to be waiting for a very long time.
But, do not despair, because what comes behind this rather tough line is some excellent news.
You are totally able to do this for yourself, and if you do, if you step into your truth and honour yourself with the things that you actually want (rather than the rules that you have had imposed upon you) you will experience an empowering of self that is so exciting that you will never feel the same again. You will be a different person.
We have all, at some point, been held back for fear of criticism or judgment. We have dampened our desires and ambitions to make them fit the expected norms. It’s really hard to be the person who stands out and opens themselves up for being noticed as different, even in a country like this one, where there are laws to protect your freedom. It’s much easier to push your thoughts back down and tell yourself that only certain lucky people are allowed to be ‘extra’ and allowed to have a life where they can wear what they want - but guess what? No one has any more right or access than you do. Anyone who wears bold, brilliant, wacky, fabulous, sexy, any and all of those people you can think of (be it Harry Styles, Luinluland, Billy Porter, or simply the guy in your town who wears a skirt in the supermarket) all of them, at some point, had to dive through the wave of fear and come out on the other side. They didn’t know how the world was going to react to them until after they had tried it.
There is something so attractive about people who know what they like. People who act with confidence even when they are doing, or wearing, something that goes against the grain. We were talking about this at Moot HQ the other day, about how unbelievably cool guys in suits and heels can look - but only if they OWN IT. You can’t do it in an apologetic way, sneaking into the building via the back door, dropping your scarf to the floor to hide your feet - but if you hold your head up, stride in smiling and give everyone a hearty hello, people are going to feel a bit of awe for your confidence, no matter what they think of your shoes.
Confidence is sexy. Super sexy.
If you want to wear Moot, DO IT! Do it with pretend confidence at first. Dip your toe in and imagine you are bold. Try on the confidence along with the Westwood! It won’t be far behind!
If you are going to hold back because someone else will not like it, where do you draw the line? What else will you deny yourself because someone else is making the choice for you?
Will you stop driving that blue car because they don’t like blue? Eating pizza because they don’t like it?
Honestly, as easy as it may be to say it from this side of the screen, Jules was once in the same situation. Fearful of the outcome.
But he decided to own the choice. To honour himself, and with it came not only acceptance, but fun, connections, empowerment and a whole business where hundreds and hundreds of people have commented on how wonderful he looks and what a cool thing he is doing.
Jules wasn’t magically born lucky. There is no special pass for anyone. He bravely stepped into his truth and the confidence and happiness followed him. There isn’t much that’s more attractive than a person who is as honest and real as that.
This is a great post, Jules. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and thought of how far I’ve come with how I express myself with the choices I’ve made.
As someone who lives on his own, I have no partner to get the ‘approval’ from and that as nobody else is around in my home, there’s no one here to stop me, so I’m lucky in that sense.
It’s only been about two and a half months since wearing lingerie and I have to say, it feels amazing! I recall when I got my first order, I thought to myself’ I shouldn’t be doing this’ and looked in the bathroom mirror to see myself wearing my new underwear. I had those ‘voices’ in my head saying off-putting things like ‘This is girls’ underwear!’ ‘What on earth do you think you look like!?’ or the general jeering laughs that would come from people, in particular from guys about what I was wearing, but then soon after a sensational feeling came about, and I soon started to realise that it is not about how other’s wish to perceive me. It’s how I want to be perceived myself and need no permission from anyone about it especially in my own home.
Now most evenings that come round, I usually like to slip on my panties and wear them around my flat and each time I look in the mirror, I do like to admire how beautiful my body looks – I love my body and when paired with wearing lingerie , it brings out a feeling like never before. And in that moment of pure sensation, I forget what had happened during the day should anything not have gone right. I may be a guy. But we should not need permission to achieve this kind of feeling.
Though even with me being happy with wearing my lingerie, I still need to work on getting ‘out there’ in public to allow me to achieve my goals. For example, going to a salon to get waxing done. But this means taking myself to an environment, an environment which to me always come across as a ‘women’s only’ space. I’ve not too long ago started shaving my body more regularly as I’m not a body hair person at all and the feeling of a silky-smooth body is heavenly to me and should not be gender specific on who gets to feel good from it or the ‘allowed’ areas that a guy can take hair off from. I don’t need to justify being a cyclist or swimmer for being a guy to remove hair from his body – and I’m not either of these. But it’s my body, my choice. If I want a smooth, hair-free body, let me have it that way!
Again, great post.
This is a great post, Jules. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it and thought of how far I’ve come with how I express myself with the choices I’ve made.
As someone who lives on his own, I have no partner to get the ‘approval’ from and that as nobody else is around in my home, there’s no one here to stop me, so I’m lucky in that sense.
It’s only been about two and a half months since wearing lingerie and I have to say, it feels amazing! I recall when I got my first order, I thought to myself’ I shouldn’t be doing this’ and looked in the bathroom mirror to see myself wearing my new underwear. I had those ‘voices’ in my head saying off-putting things like ‘This is girls’ underwear!’ ‘What on earth do you think you look like!?’ or the general jeering laughs that would come from people, in particular from guys about what I was wearing, but then soon after a sensational feeling came about, and I soon started to realise that it is not about how other’s wish to perceive me. It’s how I want to be perceived myself and need no permission from anyone about it especially in my own home.
Now most evenings that come round, I usually like to slip on my panties and wear them around my flat and each time I look in the mirror, I do like to admire how beautiful my body looks – I love my body and when paired with wearing lingerie , it brings out a feeling like never before. And in that moment of pure sensation, I forget what had happened during the day should anything not have gone right. I may be a guy. But we should not need permission to achieve this kind of feeling.
Though even with me being happy with wearing my lingerie, I still need to work on getting ‘out there’ in public to allow me to achieve my goals. For example, going to a salon to get waxing done. But this means taking myself to an environment, an environment which to me always come across as a ‘women’s only’ space. I’ve not too long ago started shaving my body more regularly as I’m not a body hair person at all and the feeling of a silky-smooth body is heavenly to me and should not be gender specific on who gets to feel good from it or the ‘allowed’ areas that a guy can take hair off from. I don’t need to justify being a cyclist or swimmer for being a guy to remove hair from his body – and I’m not either of these. But it’s my body, my choice. If I want a smooth, hair-free body, let me have it that way!
Again, great post.
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